People have a budget, but that doesn't mean they are forward thinking about future costs. When the slimy salesman sits a person down, he divides a paper into 4 sections (the infamous four square).
1. Current vehicle trade-in value (trading in is financially suboptimal)
2. Down payment
3. Purchase price
4. Monthly payment
Notice cost of gas isn't in there, or total cost of ownership, or anything that someone concerned with making prudent financial decisions would be concerned with. A budget is simply a way to "afford" something. It has little to do with financial prudence.
BTW, the entire reason I created my own total cost of ownership spreadsheet is because it literally doesn't exist on the whole entire internet. I Googled like crazy for a tool like that, but such a thing is so NOT in demand by people that nobody created one. I had to be the first human in the world to do it. There's probably been a handful of people interested enough to use it.
The only reason articles are written on either side of the "affordability debate" is simply to make jabs at the other side to generate click revenue.
The only generally true thing that can be said about total cost of ownership is that EVs tend to be more affordable the more miles they are driven compared to an ICE. Someone driving 4,000 miles a year is probably financially better off with an ICE, and someone commuting 100 miles per day is probably financially better off with an EV. Things like free charging are among the many, many factors that play into these equations.
EDIT: Running the numbers in my spreadsheet given the following assumptions which apply to my situation;
8 years of ownership
Base model MSRP of each vehicle
12,000 miles
$3.22 / gallon gas
$0.10 / kWh
Double maintenance cost for ICE
No financing
No taxes
75% vehicle depreciation for both vehicles
All other parameters the same
Bolt EUV costs me $35,000 over 8 years
RAV4 costs me $38,500 over 8 years
Somewhere around 6,000 annual miles is the breakeven point between the EUV and RAV4. Any less miles, and the RAV4 is cheaper, and any more the EUV becomes cheaper.
Looks like my WAG of 4,000 miles being cheaper to drive an ICE was pretty close.